i struggled on what to name this post, so i’ll just call it ‘Anti-Neutral’…

The press is so powerful in its image-making role, it can make the criminal look like he’s the victim and make the victim look like he’s the criminal. This is the press, an irresponsible press… If you aren’t careful, the newspapers will have you hating the people who are being oppressed and loving the people who are doing the oppressing.

-El Hajj Malik El Shabazz (Malcolm X), 1964

History lies at the core of every conflict. A true and unbiased understanding of the past offers the possibility of peace. The distortion or manipulation of history, in contrast, will only sow disaster.

-Ilan Pappé

“If you are neutral in situations of injustice, you have chosen the side of the oppressor. If an elephant has its foot on the tail of a mouse and you say that you are neutral, the mouse will not appreciate your neutrality.”

-Desmond Tutu

Here is a tip for you: If the west stands behind something, it’s a good idea to run the other way.

i am far from the greatest expert on historical events; that being said, in the near half-century i’ve been on this earth, i have come to understand two things: That the west (and its allies) installs a well-funded and well-publicized narrative which dictates geopolitical perceptions, and those who openly counter said narrative are silenced, isolated, treated patronizingly, bullied… and/or worse.

With countless, well documented evidence of the west’s objectives of global hegemony, destabilization of democratically elected governments and complete access to resources and land by any means; it is amazing that with:

-USAID’s objectives in Nicaragua (and of course NSDD-17)
-The outright plan laid in 1960 to starve the masses of Cuba out
-The CIA-backed destabilization of an Allende government in Chile
-The U.S. backed usurping of the Yanukovych government in Ukraine in 2014

…and much more, it is amazing to me that people unquestioningly and uncritically take in information on what are being called ‘global conflicts’ from news sources that are backed by Boeing, General Electric, Lockheed Martin, Raytheon and other defense companies and contractors. Every news source around the world holds a particular objective, but to only be inundated by western media, to assume that western media has the best of intentions, and to never ask questions as to why this source demonizes particular ‘opposing’ groups?

Yes, it is amazing to me.

The way many (particularly in the west) address particular events, there is no consideration of context. Major world events exist in a vacuum, outside of an historical analysis.

The 7th of October, 2023 is no different.

Israel-based historian and author Ilan Pappé stated in 2017, “The exceptional part of the story is that settler colonialism made certain connections, or made certain assumptions which were accepted in the 19th century, but looked ridiculous, inhuman and nondemocratic in the 20th century. And yet, in the particular case of Israel they still remain valid. For instance, the claim that the only way you can create a democracy in a country which has settlers and natives is if the settlers are always the majority, which is the argument of the liberal Zionists, not the right wing Zionists. The liberal Zionists, the whole peace process is based on the idea that the only way democracy can be sustained in Palestine is if the Jews are a majority in their own homeland. So this is a ridiculous assumption, that in any other context would be rejected as racist; but in the case of Israel is accepted. The interesting part of the analysis… Why educated, well-read people in the west do not see this.”

In order to understand what happened on this October day, we must understand what settler colonialism is. Colonialism is defined by dominance and subjugation. The objective of settler colonialism is the the replacement of a people, society and culture(s) that had previously existed. In order for this to be effective, methods of repression, containment, cessation and genocide must be waged. One of the most recent cases of naked, unfettered settler colonialist practice is from 2021, when Long Island, New York-based Jacob Fauci shows up to the house of the El-Kurd family, out of nowhere. Muna El-Kurd (of Sheikh Jarrah) laments the theft of the house. Fauci cavalierly responds, “…If I don’t steal it, someone else is gonna steal it.”

In his book Ten Myths About Israel, Pappé observes the word ‘occupation’ as being “somewhat redundant and relevant,” due to “(t)wo generations of Palestinians… already liv(ing) under this regime.” He argues that ‘colonialism’, which he notes as “the movement of Europeans to different parts of the world, creating new ‘white’ nations where indigenous people had once had their own kingdoms,” is far more applicable. He adds, “These nations could only be created if the settlers employed two logics: the logic of elimination- getting rid by all means possible of the indigenous people, including by genocide; and the logic of dehumanization- regarding the non-Europeans as inferior and thus not deserving the same rights as the settlers.”

We should there form a portion of a rampart of Europe against Asia, an outpost of civilization as opposed to barbarism. We should as a neutral state remain in contact with all Europe, which would have to guarantee our existence.

-Theodor Herzl

The undertaking will be made great and promising by the granting of colonial rights… In some short years the Empire would be bigger by a rich colony. The fact that nothing exists in this territory at present does not militate against my assertions.

-Theodor Herzl

You are being invited to help make history. That cannot frighten you, nor will you laugh at it. It is not in your accustomed line; it doesn’t involve Africa, but a piece of Asia Minor, not Englishmen, but Jews.

-Theodor Herzl, To Cecil Rhodes

As much as i love getting into minutiae, i’m not going to get into as much of it here; not only will others do a much better job at this subject than i; getting into minutiae will also make this piece much longer than it already will be (and you already know i love to write).

i will say this though: Theodor Herzl was part of the comprador class. He sold out his people to have a seat at the table. He was one of several who participated in advocating for negotiating the theft of land. He studied the methods of the colonizers before him, and desired the same things under the guise of historical context- the expulsion and rejection of Jewish people under various conquests and warring periods. Among discussion for the search for a Jewish homeland with the British, Uganda was one several places up for consideration.

To get even more specific (beyond Herzl), you could say that the partition of Palestine (by the British and French in particular) wasn’t unlike the results of the Berlin Conference and ‘The Scramble For Africa’. In fact, it was such a scramble that the British had a hand in the facilitation of what we are seeing today, as they made a promise to back independence movements of the Arab populations in the area, if they enlisted to help defeat the Ottomans. Amid this ‘promise’ we see negotiations at play in the early parts of 1917, between the British government and Zionists such as Nahum Sokolow and Chaim Azriel Weizmann. These negotiations resulted in a short letter, penned by foreign secretary Arthur Balfour to Walter Rothschild on November 2, 1917 (famously known as ‘The Balfour Declaration’):

Dear Lord Rothschild,

I have much pleasure in conveying to you. on behalf of His Majesty’s Government, the following declaration of sympathy with Jewish Zionist aspirations which has been submitted to, and approved by, the Cabinet

His Majesty’s Government view with favour the establishment in Palestine of a national home for the Jewish people, and will use their best endeavors to facilitate the achievement of this object, it being clearly understood that nothing shall be done which may prejudice the civil and religious rights of existing non-Jewish communities in Palestine or the rights and political status enjoyed by Jews in any other country.

I should be grateful if you would bring this declaration to the knowledge of the Zionist Federation.

Yours,

Arthur James Balfour

Interestingly, the part of the letter where it states that “…nothing shall be done which may prejudice the civil and religious rights of existing non-Jewish communities in Palestine…” was written as a means of quieting any protests from antizionist Jews and others at the time that this was an out and out land grab.

Speaking to its objectives, Bernard Regan names Zionism in his book The Balfour Declaration as “a nationalist revivalist response to the pogroms which were carried out, especially in Eastern Europe. The Zionist project of creating a homeland for the Jewish people was a minority current within the Jewish community. Those who established the movement recognized from its inception that to achieve their goal would require a powerful patron. The movement’s leaders approached every major imperial power seeking their backing: British, German, French, Russian and Ottoman potentates were all canvassed.”

If we are to study the context and history of the formation of Israel, one could say that the massive support from the EU and the U.S. in particular could be seen as a form of penance for their crimes; the reality is though, the west ultimately still sees the area as a region to control. On these recent events, Foreign Minister Yván Gil of Venezuela (a country which sent humanitarian aid to Gaza) stated, “Everything that happens there is because they want to use Israel as a military enclave in the east to control the natural wealth of the region from there.” Israel essentially exists as a military-based neo-colony of the U.S.. Current (as i write this) President Joseph Biden has also stated in the past that economic assistance to Israel is “the best $3 billion investment we make. Were there not an Israel, the United States Of America would have to invent an Israel to protect her interests in the region.”

There is no doubt that any discussion regarding the Israel/Palestine question MUST be a question of land.

The British are tricksters. The west (and the compradors) are tricksters.

Map Of Palestine (1886)

By its own admission (in both examples of Fauci and in Herzl (the founder of Zionism)’s own writings, such as The Jewish State), the foundation of Israel is based on settler colonialism, which again is defined as the replacement of people who are indigenous to the land. In the United Nations Declaration On The Rights Of Indigenous Peoples (adopted in 2007), article 2 states:

Indigenous peoples and individuals are free and equal to all other peoples and individuals and have the right to be free from any kind of discrimination, in the exercise of their rights, in particular that based on their indigenous origin or identity.

Article 3:

Indigenous peoples have the right to self-determination. By virtue of that right they freely determine their political status and freely pursue their economic, social and cultural development.

Article 8.2:

States shall provide effective mechanisms for prevention of, and redress for:

(a) Any action which has the aim or effect of depriving them of their integrity as distinct
peoples, or of their cultural values or ethnic identities;
(b) Any action which has the aim or effect of dispossessing them of their lands, territories or resources; (c) Any form of forced population transfer which has the aim or effect of violating or undermining any of their rights; (d) Any form of forced assimilation or integration; (e) Any form of propaganda designed to promote or incite racial or ethnic discrimination directed against them.

Article 9:

Indigenous peoples and individuals have the right to belong to an indigenous community or nation, in accordance with the traditions and customs of the community or nation concerned. No discrimination of any kind may arise from the exercise of such a right.

Article 30.1:

Military activities shall not take place in the lands or territories of indigenous peoples, un-
less justified by a relevant public interest or otherwise freely agreed with or requested by
the indigenous peoples concerned.

In the midst of everything happening i decided to take a close up picture of the map on my wall. The thought in my mind both as i looked at the photo and in reading the UN Declaration was, ‘Is Palestine included in this declaration?’

Palestine is absent- not only from the map on my wall, but on oft-used applications such as Google maps as well. In a 2013 paper produced by the UN Human Rights Commission entitled Indigenous Peoples and the United Nations Human Rights System, it states, “Many indigenous peoples populated areas before the arrival of others and often retain distinct cultural and political characteristics, including autonomous political and legal structures, as well as a common experience of domination by others, especially non-indigenous groups, and a strong historical and ongoing connection to their lands, territories and resources, including when they practise nomadic lifestyles.”

Even as many of the Indigenous peoples of Turtle Island (what people call the U.S.) are recognized as ‘tribes’; treaties have not been honored, their stories minimized, and people continue to live on reservations, experience educational disparities as well as a rash of health and economic struggles due to historical mistreatment. In Canada, only three are recognized: the Métis, First Nations and Inuit people. Though it was rejected by the majority, there was an election in 2022 in Chile for the adoption of a constitution (heavily supported by president Gabriel Boric) which would have replaced the previous one, which was formulated under (the U.S. backed) Augusto Pinochet. The proposed constitution addressed environmental impacts, gender and educational disparities and establishing autonomy for Indigenous peoples, including the Mapuche people. There has also recently been news about a constitutional referendum that was rejected in Australia (a whole settler colonial continent), which would have recognized Indigenous populations. The governments of settler colonial areas around the world clearly have not heeded the words of the UN. And it’s clear they don’t have to.

Especially if you don’t exist on a map.

Palestinian Refugees, 1948 (Fred Csasznik, public domain)

“I’m still convinced that nonviolence is the most potent weapon available to oppressed people in their struggle for freedom and justice. I feel that violence will only create more social problems than they will solve. That in a real sense it is impracticable for the Negro to even think of mounting a violent revolution in the United States. So I will continue to condemn riots, and continue to say to my brothers and sisters that this is not the way. And continue to affirm that there is another way. But at the same time, it is as necessary for me to be as vigorous in condemning the conditions which cause persons to feel that they must engage in riotous activities as it is for me to condemn riots. I think America must see that riots do not develop out of thin air. Certain conditions continue to exist in our society which must be condemned as vigorously as we condemn riots. But in the final analysis, a riot is the language of the unheard. And what is it that America has failed to hear? It has failed to hear that the plight of the Negro poor has worsened over the last few years. It has failed to hear that the promises of freedom and justice have not been met. And it has failed to hear that large segments of white society are more concerned about tranquility and the status quo than about justice, equality, and humanity. And so in a real sense our nation’s summers of riots are caused by our nation’s winters of delay. And as long as America postpones justice, we stand in the position of having these recurrences of violence and riots over and over again. Social justice and progress are the absolute guarantors of riot prevention.”

-Martin Luther King, Jr., 1966

“(C)hoose peace rather than confrontation, except in cases where we cannot get, where we cannot proceed, where we cannot move forward. Then, if the only alternative is violence, we will use violence.”

Nelson Mandela, 1999

I am not interested in picking up crumbs of compassion thrown from the table of someone who considers himself my master. I want the full menu of rights.

-Desmond Tutu

No matter how many aim to frame it as such, just as mentioned with any major world event; October 7, 2023 did not happen in a vacuum. People are reacting over the past number of days to 75 years’ worth of living under occupation and displacement.

Similar to what i wrote here; i would like you to once again imagine someone who has been repeatedly abused by a spouse. Their food intake is controlled. Their comings and goings are controlled. They are beaten down every single day. They are prevented from having friends, or seeing family. They ask for help but they are never supported or believed, because the abuser is a ‘pillar of the community’. There is an attempt at divorce, but it gets rejected. They have filed out a restraining order, and it has been violated. The abuser briefly goes to jail, but is friends with the judge, and the sheriff.

The person who has been abused has gone through official/legal channels; they have gone to community and whatever family they were able to contact. There aren’t many other options they see as viable, except for self-defense. The abuser is now gone, and the abused has been arrested. During the trial (as well as by the press), the abused is asked why they have not gone through ‘legal channels’ to address the abuse.

If you are reading this and empathize (or at the very least sympathize) with the abused; if you have marched in the streets chanting ‘Black Lives Matter’ in response to state violence upon African people; if you’ve ever participated in a campaign to ‘Free Nelson Mandela!’ and cried of joy upon his release from prison; if you’ve ever lamented gender-based violence and supported a ‘Me Too’ movement (whether it was the OG movement started by Tarana Burke or the one appropriated by Hollywood years later); if you’ve ever claimed to have supported the ‘civil rights’ movement (including ‘marching with Martin Luther King’)…

If you have petitioned for people like Florida governor Ron DeSantis to be impeached, yet are silent on the appointment of Avi Maoz to the Education Department, then you must examine your contradictions. If you claim to have supported all of these social justice movements and yet currently disagree with the fight for Palestinian people’s self-determination by any means necessary, then you must ask yourself if you actually support social justice movements, or a certain, hygienic perception of it.

People to this day will honor what is called the ‘American Revolution’; the armed revolt against the British, and the establishment of ‘America’, on what we call the 4th of the Lie… all while calling armed struggle against western imperialist forces ‘animalistic’ or ‘barbaric.’ If you in any way, shape or form stated you’ve lent support to any sort of social justice movement waged by oppressed peoples, ask yourself if you merely support the end result of the small victories, or the again, armed struggle waged against the forces which created those conditions which prompted that armed struggle. If you have cookouts on July 4th, do you think about the violent displacement of indigenous folks, and forced labor of African people, both of which contributed to the foundation of the establishment of what you call ‘the U.S.?’ Or is it just a ‘day off’?

It’s clear that celebrities such as Mark Hamill or the executive branch of the U.S. don’t, as they make comments commemorating Indigenous People’s Day, while simultaneously supporting or are silent about the genocide and outright settler colonialism upon Palestinians.

When you say you support social justice movements, do you also support the slave revolts in Haiti, Cuba and beyond, where enslavers were murdered? Do you agree with the status quo perspective of those respective times, that the ANC, the Black Panther Party For Self Defense, The American Indian Movement, The Deacons For Defense and other organized formations were ‘terrorists’ due to their waging of armed struggle?

Is your support for social justice conditional? This question is addressed succinctly by Nidal Khalaf:

“You may wonder why none of these groups ever supported our armed resistance. You may wonder why they feel entitled to justify their stance on today’s events by starting with a disclaimer regarding “condemning ALL violence,” and then moving on towards crying over our dead bodies and asking for “international law” to be applied. The same “law” that fortified our genocide and accepted our murderers as a “nation.”

The real answer to this phenomenon lies in the core of the solidarity adopted by these groups and individuals. For them, being pro-Palestine is a moral exercise, where they can vent the excess luxury derived from their superior human system of values on an endangered species called the “Palestinians.”

For this reason, we HAVE to be victims so that their moral scheme can be applied. But if we fight back; if we kill our oppressors; if we develop a miraculous armed resistance from within an international and regional siege, their whole moral world collapses. Instantaneously, we transform into inhumane fanatical terrorists who impose an equal violence to settler colonialism. One can ask: but how can this shift in mindset occur so quickly? Easy. Because the moment we disturb the status quo of hegemony, we target the main source of identity for those identifying within the Western scheme of values. 

If you claim to support Palestine while re-defining the political context of the struggle to fit the narrative that suits your Western “values,” you are contributing to the hijacking of Palestinian voices, narratives, and the real meaning of solidarity. If you claim to support Palestinians, while shying away from supporting our resistance groups, then you are another manifestation of Western hegemony. A hegemony that extends beyond military occupation and economic war, towards moral subjection (domination). This moral subjection is a cruel aspect of colonial violence, one where the oppressed is forced to re-identify themselves from the moral compass of the oppressor.

In short, if you support us as corpses, but not as freedom fighters…”

In line with this, in response to the silence of feminists in Israel, Nadera Shalhoub-Kevorkian produced a paper in 2014 called Palestinian Feminist Critique and the Physics of Power: Feminists Between Thought and Practice:

“To understand the physics of power means to understand the matrix of geopolitical and biopolitical power, in order to highlight the protection provided to the ideologies and strategies of domination and control deployed by the powerful. To comprehend this physics, one must first understand its workings, and its strategies of protecting and ensuring the survival of a certain power. Understanding this physics also entails a deep, wide-ranging understanding of the immoral position taken by the greater part of Israeli feminist analysis, which does not address Zionist settler colonialism prior to, during and after the Nakba, despite its role in violating the rights of Palestinians in general and of Palestinian women in the Jewish state and in dispersing their people throughout the world. On the contrary, in many cases Israeli feminists have supported these violations, or at best remained silent about them. The majority of Israeli feminists have produced feminist knowledge that embarks on feminist action that contemplates Palestinian suffering only since the second occupation of 1967, i.e. the occupation of the East Jerusalem, West Bank and Gaza Strip.  Some Israeli feminists did not even take this military occupation into consideration.   For most Israeli feminists, crimes against humanity conducted during the Nakba period and afterward, the displacement, dispossession and dispersion, and the state’s crimes against Palestinians, are simply discounted.

Constructing a feminist epistemology and praxis requires developing a new awareness of the physics of power. It entails understanding the nature and significance of solidarity with the dispossessed, something that global feminism, international law, and Israeli feminism have so far failed to do… Israeli feminists live a life of relative ease at the expense of Palestinian suffering, which they look through without making any concrete political intervention. They do not see (or perhaps they pretend not to notice) the repercussions of the events of the Nakba as a central issue for feminist action and theorizing. Their refusal to acknowledge the effects of incessant violence/oppression and the daily practices of resistance employed by the Palestinian woman, on whom the global and local (including the “feminist”) physics of power has imposed itself, is immoral and, crucially, not feminist. I would argue that one can’t define her/himself as a feminist while turning an entire nation, and an ongoing injustice and inhumanity, into ‘Present Absentees’.”

People in this day and age love to tout Nelson Mandela as being ‘a man of peace’, isolating their idealization of him from the reality that even as President of the ANC he advocated for waging armed struggle against oppressors. Understanding his position as an anti-imperialist one, in 1990 he said, “If one has to refer to any of the parties as a terrorist state, one might refer to the Israeli government, because they are the people who are slaughtering defenseless and innocent Arabs in the occupied [Palestinian] territories, and we don’t regard that as acceptable.” In 1997 he also said, “The temptation in our situation is to speak in muffled tones about an issue such as the right of the people of Palestine…we can easily be enticed to read reconciliation and fairness as meaning parity between justice and injustice. Having achieved our own freedom, we can fall into the trap of washing our hands of difficulties that others faces…yet we would be less than human if we did so…it behooves all South Africans, themselves erstwhile beneficiaries of generous international support, to stand up and be counted among those contributing actively to the cause of freedom and justice…”

Nelson Mandela was removed from the U.S. terrorist watch list in 2008.

“The inhumanity that won’t let ambulances reach the injured, farmers tend their land or children attend school… This treatment is familiar to me and the many Black South Africans who were corralled and harassed by the security forces of the apartheid government.”

– Desmond Tutu

“Israel always victimizes itself and I have never seen a victim putting its oppressor under siege and bombing them 24/7.”

– Bassem Youssef

The National Liberation Front, at the time when the people were undergoing the most massive assaults of colonialism, did not hesitate to prohibit certain forms of action and constantly to remind the fighting units of the international laws of war. In a war of liberation, the colonized people must win, but they must do so cleanly, without “barbarity.” The European nation that practices torture is a blighted nation, unfaithful to its history. The underdeveloped nation that practices torture thereby confirms its nature, plays the role of an undeveloped people. If it does not wish to be morally condemned by the “Western nations,” an underdeveloped nation is obliged to practice fair play, even while its adversary ventures, with a clear conscience, into the unlimited exploration of new means of terror.

An underdeveloped people must prove, by its fighting power, its ability to set itself up as a nation, and by the purity of every one of its acts, that it is, even to the smallest detail, the most lucid, the most self-controlled people. But this is all very difficult.

-Frantz Fanon, A Dying Colonialism

Nonviolence is not defined by non-action, just as peace is not the absence of war. We must never observe peace through the lens of our own comfort. We must never understand peace to be the absence of war as we are conditioned to perceive it, for as long as a hierarchical structure of oppressor and oppressed exists there will never be peace. In this case we must never observe war as simply being between two (or more) equal parties, as this hierarchical structure is always going to ensure there is a war ‘on’ or ‘against’ those who are oppressed.

i am always reminded of when i lived across the hall in a large house, from a man who was abusing his partner. While this abuser was seen as a problem by the owner of the house primarily due to economic issues; i was the only one confronting him about his actions, as other men in the house said to me that what he did was none of their business, because he was not physically beating her. It got to the point where i ended up moving, because i was being threatened with violence from this person. The response to my moving was essentially a shoulder shrug. i did find out after running into the woman in a store many months later that she finally left her abuser; while i was incredibly happy for her (amid thinking about my own experiences in abusive relationships), it was always impossible to ignore how the intersections of class, race and gender (merging with the reactionary, carceral environment of the U.S. in particular) shape societal concepts of violence.

Partner or gender-based violence is not usually seen as violence until there is physical evidence of it. Sanctions and blockades (‘economic warfare’ in short) work in similar ways- sanctions exist even in the U.S. but they are not seen as such because they are ‘hidden in plain sight’ with food deserts and educational and housing inequities. Globally, what the U.S. supports and enacts are sanctions, as well as “unilateral coercive measures (UCMs), which violate international law because they operate outside the structure provided by the United Nations. Legal sanctions are used as a punishment after a legal process determines a country violated a law. Unilateral coercive measures are imposed by the US and its western imperialist allies based on lies and without due process in order to effect a desired political outcome, such as regime change or retaliation.”

Sanctions are seen and encouraged as a means of retaliation against an enemy (usually of the west); the effects of the ‘unseen hand’ of the sanctions is where the violence lies.

Credit: Yuliy Ganf (Krokodil #4, February 1953)

“Could it be that reality is not so full of hate and incitement like they’re trying to sell us? Maybe, what is really happening doesn’t create enough views so we need to spice it up, make it more extreme, take it out of context? What do you want? A colorless news site that describes the colorless reality and that no one visits, or fake news filled with action, good guys and bad guys, shooting, and a Jewish state that in the end is always right and always victorious?”

-Assaf Harel

“American leadership is what holds the world together. American alliances are what keep us, America, safe. American values are what make us a partner other nations want to work with. To put all that at risk if we walk away from Ukraine, if we turn our backs on Israel, it’s just not worth it. That’s why tomorrow I’m going to send to Congress an urgent budget request to fund America’s national security needs, to support our critical partners, including Israel and Ukraine. It’s a smart investment that’s going pay dividends for American security for generations. Help us keep American troops out of harm’s way. Help us build a world that is safer, more peaceful, more prosperous for our children and grandchildren.”

-Joseph Biden, October 19, 2023

“The reactionaries only stay in power by arms. That is the only way they stay in power. But they legitimize their violence and they tell everybody else violence is not the way.

Guerilla warfare should never be discussed as to whether it’s right or wrong. It is the only way to stop exploitation and oppression. To carry on a discussion of whether it’s right or wrong is to play the game of the imperialists.”

-Kwame Ture

In what is one of the greatest examples of doublespeak and projection i have seen in the course of this constantly shifting news cycle, U.S. Secretary Of State Antony Blinken’s appearance on Face The Nation doesn’t do very well at an attempt to muster up notions of ‘manufacturing consent,’ to even the most trusting of media consumers. In Manufacturing Consent: The Political Economy Of The Mass Media, Edward S. Herman and Noam Chomsky define it as “…The media serv(ing), and propagandiz(ing) on behalf of, the powerful societal interests that control and finance them.”

On the question of a ceasefire with the cries of ‘Enough is enough!”, Blinken responds, “Enough is enough should have been the case with Hamas two weeks ago. It would be good to hear the entire world speaking clearly, and with one voice about the actions that Hamas took, about the slaughter of people, about the fact that that should be absolutely intolerable, unacceptable to anyone, anywhere. Any country, any people.”

Again, it is important to remember that what happened on October 7, 2023 did not start with October 7, 2023. What happened on this day was a response to decades of living under apartheid, and under occupation. It was a response of what has happened in the West Bank (where Hamas is not heavily populated, by the way), in Jenin, in Jerusalem, and beyond.

“Every life… Palestinian, Israeli, Jewish, Muslim, Arab; every life has equal worth. When I see the reports; when I see the photographs, when I hear the stories of young children, Palestinian children who have been killed or injured, it hits me right in the gut too, just as it does when I hear… when I see these other stories; wherever it is. We had here in our own country a little boy, six years old… who was viciously murdered, apparently because he was Palestinian-American. A little boy, six years old. Didn’t do anything to anyone. I feel that strongly across the board, no matter where it is. But this is on Hamas.”

While he blames Hamas for what happened to a six-year old boy on the other side of the world, he concedes that what he calls Hamas’ “aspiration” is “a legitimate aspiration for a state of their own.”

“The only way to defeat an ideology, no matter how warped… is to make sure there’s a better. clearer alternative for people. That alternative is very clear. And it’s very stark.” He addresses normalization and integration as being effective tools of “lift(ing) up the rights of the Palestinian people.” He states that Hamas’ vision is “death, destruction, nihilism, darkness…”

If the west is consistently providing economic and military assistance to their occupiers, why would the Palestinian people want an alternative that is dictated by the west? Also, how does one concede that the aspiration for an autonomous state is “legitimate,” yet also consider that aspiration to be one of “death, destruction, nihilism and darkness”? Blinken literally addressed what the solution is- the end of the occupation- however, he continues to blame Hamas for the material conditions of Palestinians. He blames Hamas for the murder of a child in another part of the world.

The Palestinian cause is not a cause for Palestinians only, but a cause for every revolutionary, wherever he is, as a cause of the exploited and oppressed masses in our era.

-Ghassan Kanafani

If “every life has equal worth,” how does one reckon with the collective punishment of the people of Gaza? At the time of this writing, over 7,000 people have died (or have been killed, half of them children) as a result of this onslaught. In no way is this onslaught proportional to the deaths that occurred in Israel, which Netanyahu and others compared to the deaths that occurred on September 11, 2001. i am sure it’s a possibility that among the people who died in Israel on October 7 there may have been some who protested the Netanyahu government at the time of their deaths. i’m sure there were all kinds of people, innocent people who do not represent the corrupt, right wing government of the place they reside; what we all know for sure is that Israel’s reaction to their deaths is disproportionate to the actual deaths. Because of this, he is being seen as a ‘liability’ by many in Israel.

This is the part that eventually broke me. My heart has been breaking since i made the decision to write this piece, as it always does in some way when writing about the damaging effects of capitalism and imperialism. Even as my heart was breaking it was the general anger towards those who aim to uphold the war machine that produced a certain stoicism, to allow me to stay afloat and keep writing. But that stoicism began to crack when i saw Joseph Biden and others suggest that the number of deaths of Palestinians at the hands of the Israeli government and military were overinflated, and that the Palestinian Health Ministry was a tool of Hamas. To add salt to the wound that hasn’t even had time to heal, Biden adds, “I’m sure innocents have been killed, and it’s the price of waging a war.”

As a response, the Health Ministry produced a report, listing the names of those who have been killed. Scrolling through this report, i cried for the first time since writing this piece.

If every life had equal worth to anyone standing with Israel, how does one defend depriving a population of two million people from having substantial access to fresh water, medicines, electricity and fuel? How does one rationalize slowly (and quickly) killing newborn babies, people in need of machines in order to breathe, and the many others in hospitals, then say, ‘Well, we asked you all, and gave you a bit of time to move out of the way?’ How does one defend the fact that in 2014 (the year of Operation Protective Edge), Gaza’s sole power plant at the time was also destroyed? This “complete siege” happened at the behest of Defense Minister Yoav Gallant, who said, “We are fighting human animals and we are acting accordingly.” Mordechai Kedar, researcher and political analyst, in an interview said, “I do not equate them with animals, because that is an insult to animals.” In a recent CNN interview with Jake Tapper, U.S. Senator Marco Rubio also uses language, advocating for genocide: “I don’t think there’s any way Israel can be expected to coexist or find some diplomatic off-ramp with these savages. These are people, as you’ve been reporting and others have seen, that deliberately targeted teenage girls, women, and children, and the elderly… Just horrifying things. And I don’t think we know the full extent of it yet. I mean, there’s more to come in the days and weeks ahead. You can’t coexist. They have to be eradicated.”

An even more stark reminder that the lives of Palestinians don’t matter is former Prime Minister Yair Lapid’s retelling of an experience where he met an elderly woman who said to him, “They killed my son, but at least I have cancer and I will die soon enough; I will not have to feel what I feel anymore.” Echoing the ‘unprovoked attack’ rationalization (under the pretense that those listening have not studied history, plus the tired defense of one of the most advanced militaries in the world needing to defend itself against an area they are occupying) he adds, “I want to remind you, the horrors of October the 7th has nothing to do with the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. The terrorists are not part of the struggle for a Palestinian state.” After comparing Hamas to ISIS and Al Quaida he says, “They want to kill Jews because they are Jews, and Christians because they are Christian, and moderate Muslims because they are moderate.” He naturally appeals to western chauvinism when he states Hamas had to kill festival goers in order to squelch anyone else’s appreciation for music. “Hamas don’t like music; They only love death and bloodshed.”

Lapid then had the audacity to lament that the world has moved on from supporting Israel. “Israel was given barely a week of sympathy and global shock. And then the world went back to attacking us for defending ourselves.” In terms of addressing media coverage. he encourages what he sees as the more ‘balanced’ “story told by a democratic country that is trying to protect life, and the story told by a murderous terror organization that hates life.”

No life has worth to someone whose primary interests are expansion and political control.

Statement from the No Tech For Apartheid campaign; not much has changed since this statement.

“…If you look at our life from a bird’s eye view, we’re doing pretty great. Really. Great weather, great food, great people, great beaches; it’s not so bad here in general. And that’s exactly the point, that we’re doing great, but there are a couple of million people that we’re responsible for, and they’re in a horrible state- Infrastructure, food, healthcare, education. Millions who are living in abject poverty. Gaza is on the verge of plague, hours on end without electricity or water. Israel controls everything that goes in or out… ‘But they chose Hamas, let them pay for it.’ ‘Humaneness? What does that have to do with us?’ ‘What are we, Arab lovers?’

Ever since the right wing took power, more and more voices are warning of apartheid. Are you kidding? Apartheid has been here for ages. Ages! It’s just that we’re on its good side, so it doesn’t really bother us. We’ve been abusing the Palestinians on a daily basis for years, denying them their basic rights, in Judea and Samaria, we’re taking their lands from them. Once, we used the Jewish National Fund to raise money to buy the lands. Today? We just pass a law saying we can just take their lands and that’s it. Soldiers shoot at stone-throwers because they’re a real threat, but if in Israel someone throws stones they won’t even be charged. Palestinian journalists are put on administrative detention without trial, because they wrote something. Every time we have a holiday they’re under closure, God forbid they ruin it for us. For years we’ve been deepening the hatred, the same hatred that we later complain about in peace talks: ‘Why do you incite your children against us?’ ‘Why don’t you teach them to love us?’

Israel’s most impressive innovation, more than any high-tech project or Rafael weapon, is our amazing ability to ignore what is happening mere kilometers away to our neighbors. A whole people, transparent. like it doesn’t exist. Not in the news, not online, not on social media; and definitely not in the hearts of the people.”

-Assaf Harel

While there are some, i have seen very few publicly wallow in ecstasy at the thought or sight of dead Israelis; in stark contrast i have seen many more staunch Zionists and supporters of Israel refuse to solemnly think about the actions of the place they are supporting, as the numbers of unarmed Palestinians are piling up in droves. Some are even making videos parodying the killings and blockades. As messages come in from the mainstream (and even some alternative liberal and conservative circles) in regards to ‘praying for Israel/Jews’; that same humanity is not afforded to Palestinians, whether they be Christian, Muslim, Arab or African. It is so much that the deep alliance with Zionism has people posting on social media, with no context beyond the headlines, or their emotions. Individuals such as Jamie Lee Curtis and Justin Bieber have lamented the conditions of people in Israel with accompanying photos, only to remove the posts when many pointed out they unknowingly posted pictures of people living under terror in Gaza. It’s what has Amy Schumer reposting a multi-tiered misappropriation of the ‘First They Came…’ poem by Martin Niemöller, stating that as a Jew she is now standing alone in her support for Israel… which makes no sense, given that the west is literally pouring billions into assistance, and people are getting fired from jobs for opposing the violence leashed onto the people of Gaza and the West Bank. None of these people see the humanity of Palestinian people.

While it is true that no groups of people are a monolith; the fact that it is expected in wholesale ways for anyone (in particular) among the populations of people who have lived and are living under colonization; anyone who has experienced war crimes at the hand of western imperialism, anyone who is Muslim, anyone who is Arab and/or African, and anyone who has taken on a keen study of what is happening to Palestinian people to denounce the armed struggle of people who have been under occupation for decades is nothing short of disingenuous.

The fact that (some) Palestinians feel they need to over-explain their position (and appeal to morality, showing they are not like ‘those people’) just to justify their humanity; the fact that people who literally have had family displaced and murdered by the Israeli Defense Force are asked to ‘Denounce Hamas’ as an opening question, while no one acting on behalf of Israel’s interests is ever called to task about the IDF’s actions show how deep the dehumanization of Palestinian people still is.

“At least 99% of the evil shit they do to you is not because they don’t think you’re human, it’s because they know that you are… Their brutality is generally not a function of their belief in your inhumanity; it is a function their absolute certainty of your humanity.”

-Fred Moten

He who is reluctant to recognize me opposes me.

-Frantz Fanon

The fact that people increasingly are being arrested and losing jobs and prospects due to standing in solidarity with Palestinian liberation (with CEOs calling for a blacklist… which has already been happening) proves how the marriage of capitalism and imperialism is the daily specter that haunts all of our lives. Most famously, people who were recently forced to resign or were fired are Marc Lamont Hill, Paddy Cosgrave (CEO of Web Summit), pianist Fazil Say, and Maha Dakhil of Creative Artists Agency (CAA). On the other end, there are people such as Josh Paul (who was the U.S. State Department Director) who are resigning not by force, but in response to the transfer of weapons to Israel being “shortsighted, destructive, unjust, and contradictory to the very values that we publicly espouse.” Even though Paul was one of the few who have been public, he is not the only one who objects to unilateral support for Israel. Another example is named in the book Erasing Palestine: Free Speech And Palestinian Freedom, where Rebecca Ruth Gould describes the 2021 firing of David Miller by the University Of Bristol: “The firing of David Miller was unusual in that the statements that led to Miller’s termination were made outside a university venue and during a non-work-related online meeting. Another unprecedented detail of Miller’s case is that the university terminated his employment even before he had exercised his tight to appeal the decision. The university was either already certain of what the outcome of the appeal would be, or was pressured by external parties to act quickly.”

This has also reached the literary world, where 92NY has decided to postpone their 2023-2024 reading series, due to there being a number of walkouts and resignations in response to the cancellation of an event featuring Viet Thanh Nguyen, a few hours prior to the event’s start. Nguyen’s event was canceled because he signed an open letter (a letter in which a couple of people i’ve actually either met or have personally known have signed as well) in response to the “indiscriminate violence that is still escalating against the 2.3 million Palestinians in Gaza.” In a social media post, Nguyen (who is Vietnamese, a country still reeling from the effects of western imperialism) confirmed his unwavering support for the BDS movement, adding, “The weight of the West- that is, the still beating heart of colonial and global empire- is with Israel. For any of us opposed to that injustice, we should see that Western support of Israel is not innocent. Especially when Israeli leaders turn to the rhetoric of colonial genocide: Palestinians as ‘human animals,’ Israel waging a war of the civilized against the uncivilized.”

Ultimately, this all proves that McCarthyism never left. If one were to truly live in a democracy, mass protest against a government’s economic and logistical support of an apartheid state would not be banned or targeted. If one were to truly live in a democracy, there would not be the existence of anti-BDS (Boycott/Divestment/Sanctions) legislation. It is important to note that organizations and lobby groups such as The American Israel Public Affairs Committee (AIPAC) contribute to the construction of and adherence to such policies via campaign contributions and fundraising, and that politicians and Congress members such as Ritchie Torres are propped up as faces of ‘diversity’ on Zionist interests. Torres, by the way, opined that antizionist organizations such as Jewish Voices For Peace and Jews For Racial And Economic Justice “exemplify deceptive advertising,” purposefully conflating Judaism with Zionism.

“The irony about presenting any criticism of Israel as antisemitic is that that in itself is an antisemitic trope; because antisemites are the people who like to conflate being Jewish with being a Zionist. They like to conflate Jewish identity with a particular political view. They present Jews as one monolith, with no diversity of opinion, who all support Israel with a blind fervor. That’s simply not true, and in fact, antisemites like to use the word ‘Zionist’ as a shorthand for ‘Jew’; so you have antisemites in the ADL (Anti-Defamation League) and AIPAC, basically trafficking in the same antisemitic tropes, which should be worrying to anyone who cares about antisemitism.”

-Katie Halper

“As a Jewish person, you are saddled with the idea that you are not a citizen of America or a citizen of the world; you are a citizen of Israel. And you must back their actions… and one has nothing to do with the other. And one has nothing to do with being Jewish or not being Jewish or whatever it is that people choose on their religion or on their history or on their background… What has happened in that part of the world is tragic, and unfortunately I think the biggest problem is it’s to nobody’s benefit but the Palestinian people that it get resolved. It’s not to the benefit of the Israeli government; they use the Palestinian issue as a cudgel.”

-Jon Stewart

Given that original ties to Zionism were linked more with nationalism than a strict religious affinity or identity; the fact that the strongest proponents of Zionism (many who have no familial or spiritual ties to Judaism) have no problem with labeling other Jews ‘antisemitic’ or ‘fake Jews’ should not be surprising. While the program generally seemed to be critical of right wing politics in Israel, holding particular ire for (past and present… and present again) Prime Ministers Benjamin Netanyahu and Naftali Bennett; In 2017, Assaf Harel’s closing monologue for the final episode of his program Layla Tov (or Good Night) addressed this particular issue. “But there are a few righteous in Sodom, people who see the Matrix and are trying to yell, to let us know what’s happening; maybe we’ll wake up. Breaking The Silence, B’Tselem, Yesh Din… Dozens of organizations that are only trying to tell Israeli society what is happening; and what do people say about them in return? Extremist left. Illegitimate organizations. Now, understand: anyone who says ‘extremist left’ is trying to create an equivocation with the extreme right. And this way the delegitimization of murderers like Baruch Goldstein or the murderers of the Dawabshe family will stick to organizations like Breaking The Silence or B’Tselem, ‘Because we must condemn the extremists on both sides, right?’ But they’re forgetting one small detail. On one side the extremists kill, and on the other side the ‘extremists’ talk. On one side the extremists burn people alive, and on the other side the extremists demand human rights.”

In terms of the land question, the project of Israel from a geopolitical standpoint is ultimately an anti-Jewish/antisemitic project. It was a piece of the imperialism puzzle which made all attempts to respond to ‘the Jewish question’. It was an easy way to feign apologetics for either advocating for, or remaining silent for displacement of a people, while simultaneously placing them in an area which could still be remotely controlled. It was a matter of throwing rocks while hiding hands. A Jewish person (particularly someone of European descent) calling to task the brutal actions of a racist, apartheid state is the farthest thing from ‘self-hating’ or ‘antisemitic’.

It’s humane.

The Palestine-Germany Transfer Agreement, and Nazi/Zionist flag collaboration (Jewish Telegraphic Agency, January 2, 1936): ‘The Nazi authorities today decreed that the Zionist blue-white banner is the official Jewish flag and may be displayed under protection of the police throughout Germany.’

Whether it’s Jews For Justice For Palestinians, N’amod, B’Tselem, If Not Now, Breaking The Silence (which in 2018 was banned in schools), Noam Chomsky, Judith Butler, Uri Avnery (who wrote that the government towards the end of his life in Israel and “(t)he discrimination against the Palestinians in practically all spheres of life can be compared to the treatment of the Jews in the first phase of Nazi Germany”), Israel Frey (a Jewish Orthodox journalist who was targeted simply for saying a Mourner’s Kaddish for all who perished, including Palestinians), Rabbi Brant Rosen, Ellen Brotsky and Ariel Koren, Michael Eisen (a biologist who was recently fired from his job), the people in Israel who have been protesting the settlements, Amira Hass, Uri Horesh (a professor at Achva College who was suspended), Gabor Maté, Mike Marqusee, and the many others i have not named- most whom i don’t personally know, and a few i do; their critiques and active resistance are counter to the myopic nationalism of Zionist thought. The act of indiscriminately carpet bombing a whole area (and depriving a mass of people of basic necessities) is going to eventually reach the people you are claiming to protect. Noy Katsman, whose brother was Hayim (who was killed on the 7th of October), seems to agree. “…(W)hat Israel is doing now is very clearly not in the — it’s not for the security of anyone, not to people in Israel, not to people of Gaza.”

Are young people living in Israel who are conscientious objectors antisemitic? Here are the voices of these young people, which you can find here, here and here):

“I and other youths realized that the dictatorship that exists in Israel and the dictatorship that has existed for decades in the occupied territories are inseparable. The great goal of the politicians and the settlers is to deepen the occupation and the oppression of more populations inside Israel and in the occupied territories, and to annex Area C of the West Bank.”

“Opposition to the occupation is incomplete without opposition to the legal reform, and vice versa. The people promoting the reform — Simcha Rothman, Itamar Ben Gvir, Bezalel Smotrich, are settlers. Their agenda is a settler agenda, of expanding the occupation, ethnic cleansing, and expulsions. The reform is intended to clear Area C of Palestinians, to legalize new outposts, and to grant even more privileges, enshrined in law, to settlements and settlers.”

“I am not ready to be part of the violent arm of the state, which is used to oppress people. I am not ready to be the person who oppresses Palestinians in the occupied territories, nor to be the one who oppresses Jewish and Palestinian people in demonstrations in Israel. I know there has never been a democracy or equal rights here, and I am not ready to serve a country that is fundamentally unequal.”

“…I will not agree to enlist in this army. It is an army that is occupying the West Bank and millions of Palestinians, and an army of an extreme right-wing government that is trying to bring the dictatorship from the occupied territories into Israel.”

“I oppose class separation between Jews and Palestinians. I see how the powerful and the wealthy profit from war crimes and the suffering and death that both Palestinians and we experience.”

If Zionism is attempting to enforce a particular definition of what Jewish solidarity and life entail, then Israel by its own admission is not a democracy- and of course, it’s a given that as an apartheid state, it can never be a democracy. While those who critique Israel’s policies and actions are deemed ‘antisemitic’- whether Jewish or not; Benjamin Netanyahu has no problem meeting with actual antisemites, as long as they seemingly show uncritical support for Israel. Prime Minister of Hungary Viktor Orbán has been pretty consistent on openly touting Jewish conspiracy and anti race-mixing sentiments, and ‘ol BiBi has been quite friendly with him. Then there’s this: “We reject the actions aimed at blaming Poland or the Polish nation as a whole for the atrocities committed by the Nazis and their collaborators of different nations.” There was also the time he ‘absolved’ Hitler /the Nazi Party from bearing full responsibility of the genocides which occurred in Germany. What is happening is not only anti-Jewish AND antisemitic, it is antihuman.

Netanyahu (who like Donald Trump has been involved in corruption-related cases) and his ilk (which includes his son Yair) are the European Jewish version of ‘all skin folk ain’t kin folk’.

From The Movement, September 1967

“We support the Palestinians’ just struggle for liberation one hundred percent. We will go on doing this, and we would like for all of the progressive people of the world to join our ranks in order to make a world in which all people can live.”

-Huey Newton

“…South Africa and Palestine land some 3500 miles apart, but each the concern of the same imperialist interests – each sacrificed in the name of western peoples and British Empire building.”

-Shirley Graham DuBois

The number one weapon of 20th century imperialism is Zionist dollarism, and one of the main bases for this weapon is Zionist Israel. The ever-scheming European imperialists wisely placed Israel where she could geographically divide the Arab world, infiltrate and sow the seed of dissension among African leaders and also divide the Africans against the Asians. 

Zionist Israel’s occupation of Arab Palestine has forced the Arab world to waste billions of precious dollars on armaments, making it impossible for these newly independent Arab nations to concentrate on strengthening the economies of their countries and elevate the living standard of their people…

And the continued low standard of living in the Arab world has been skillfully used by the Zionist propagandists to make it appear to the Africans that the Arab leaders are not intellectually or technically qualified to lift the living standard of their people … thus, indirectly inducing Africans to turn away from the Arabs and towards the Israelis for teachers and technical assistance…

Did the Zionists have the legal or moral right to invade Arab Palestine, uproot its Arab citizens from their homes and seize all Arab property for themselves just based on the “religious” claim that their forefathers lived there thousands of years ago? Only a thousand years ago the Moors lived in Spain. Would this give the Moors of today the legal and moral right to invade the Iberian Peninsula, drive out its Spanish citizens, and then set up a new Moroccan nation … where Spain used to be, as the European Zionists have done to our Arab brothers and sisters in Palestine?

-Malcolm X, The Egyptian Gazette (Sept. 17, 1964)

For those among us in the African diaspora who echo the sentiment that the Palestinian liberation struggle has nothing to do with us; it is crucial to remember that geopolitics does not happen in a vacuum. The struggles of African and Palestinian people are inextricably linked, and this has been so for a long time. From Angela Davis “receiv(ing) support from Palestinian political prisoners as well as from Israeli attorneys defending Palestinians” when she was imprisoned, to the relationship between the Panthers and the PLO, to the Africans in Michigan standing in solidarity with the Arab Workers’ Caucus in 1973, to Bassem Masri; there are plenty of examples which connect us.

As many have marched and protested in the streets and beyond, in response to the state-sanctioned murder of George Floyd in 2020, we must remember that the methods which killed him were taken from direct IDF tactics. The state-sanctioned murder of Africans are not isolated to the U.S.: it also happens in Israel. If you pay taxes, your taxes are being used as a means to commit ethnic cleansing, mass surveillance, geopolitical gentrification and state-sanctioned murder.

And of course, even as the government of Israel describes it as being a ‘homeland for Jews,’ the history of that relationship with African Jews is a troubled one, laced with questionable notions of desirability and purity. Even as Yosef I. Abramowitz laments about racism among (the majority European) Jewry, he is displaying an incredible disconnect between what is happening in Israel and what is happening to Africans globally, at the hands of the state: “These rallies by the Ethiopian community should be seen through the lens of hope and not despair; through the lens of Zionism and not Ferguson.”

A portion of FATAH’s message at the Pan-African Cultural Festival in Algiers (The Black Panther, October 11, 1969)

“How many times Israel have committed war crimes… live on your own cameras? Do you start by asking them to condemn themselves? Have you? You don’t… You know why I refuse to answer this question? Because I refuse the premise of it. Because at the very heart of it is misrepresentation of the whole thing. Because it’s the Palestinians that are always expected to condemn themselves.”

-Husam Zomlot, UK ambassador to Palestine

Since when does a militarily occupied people have the responsibility for a peace movement?

-Edward Said

Who planted terrorism in our area? Some came and took our land, forced us to leave, forced us to live in camps. I think this is terrorism. Using means to resist this terrorism and stop its effects – this is called struggle.

-Leila Khaled

On the question of Hamas (because i’m sure you are wondering), the emphasis on whether or not people ‘condemn’ them ultimately removes, again, the humanity and political will of the masses of Palestinian people. They are always addressed as a dichotomy when their existence (like much of everything else) should be addressed in a dialectical way. The framing of ‘Israel v. Hamas’ in debates, discussions and news reports is akin to arguing over which sports team is better. One of the best examples of this comes from war criminal George W. Bush himself: “My view is, one side is guilty, and it’s not Israel.”

Interview after interview (and in places such as the London Review Of Books open letter), you see people condemn Hamas to varying degrees. If you add amid that condemnation that Israel’s response to what happened is disproportionate; if you so much as advocate for a ceasefire, you are still seen as siding with Hamas- not the people of Palestine. Even if one were to do as the west, its allies and their propaganda wings wished; you could critique and disavow Hamas all day- but this really isn’t the point. If your condemnations are not laced with an unwavering support for Israel and its geopolitical ambitions, nothing you do will be right to them. Aiming to appeal to a ‘both sides’ or ‘condemnation’ framework is a waste of time… Because the use of ‘Hamas’ is being weaponized as a vehicle to destroy Gaza, and by extension, all of Palestine outright.

Of course, UN Secretary General António Guterres is not immune, despite his message being far from radical- He, like many, have ‘condemned Hamas.’ However, because he addressed war crimes, Israel’s immediate reaction was to revoke visas for UN officials, to “teach them a lesson.” Collective punishment apparently exists for all, if they decide it applies to you.

While Benjamin Netanyahu claims that Hamas and Hezbollah’s “goal, open goal, is to eradicate the state of Israel. The open goal of Hamas is to kill as many Jews as they could,” the IDF is doing just that to Palestinians, regardless of spiritual practice. Yoav Gallant’s order of a complete siege is doing just that. In 2021, former Prime Minister Naftali Bennett emphatically stated, “As long as I have any power and control, I won’t hand over one centimeter of land of the Land of Israel. Period.” This of course adds to something similar that Netanyahu said: “At this time we need to control all of the territory for the foreseeable future.”

This is what i do condemn: The conditions that were created in order for the events of October 7th, 2023 to materialize.

Ultimately, the voices of the masses of Palestinians- the ones who are actually UNDER OCCUPATION- are the most essential in this conversation, in regard to ANY formation of resistance, be it Hamas, or anyone else. Anyone living thousands of (or even five) miles away, dictating how people under occupation should respond to their conditions is nothing short of arrogant.

The word ‘Hamas’ is used in generalities and as one unit (because again, it’s used as a means to weaponize fear and support for military onslaught and ethnic cleansing of a whole people), despite them actually talking specifically about its armed wing, Izz al-Din al-Qassam Brigades (IQB). Hamas, like many organizations does have a history of doing community and charity work as they have a social branch, as well as a political and military one. In the midst of this constant news cycle i have heard people (allegedly) use Hamas and Islamic Jihad (PIJ) interchangeably as well. While both did come up in the ranks of the Muslim Brotherhood, they are literally two different formations. i don’t think this matters to the folks writing the scripts, because the conflation is a means of dehumanization and ‘manufactured consent’.

Hamas’ role in the ‘terrorism’ chain is not unlike what we’ve seen in other places around the world: an imperialist or colonialist force provides economic assistance and/or military intelligence as a means to counter an opposing left wing/Marxist/socialist/anti-imperialist formation. Examples of this would be Operation Cyclone (where the U.S. and the British assisted the Mujahadeen in fighting the Soviets); as well as Ronald Reagan signing into law an act for the approval of $100 million in aid to the Contras in Nicaragua, in order to destabilize the Sandinista government, some of which is described in Democracy by Force: US Intervention In The Post-Cold War World by Karin Von Hippel:

“Meanwhile, the United States had been covertly propping up Noriega’s regime. The US government had initiated with Noriega as far back as the 1950s, when he was a cadet a the Peruvian Military Academy, as part of a campaign to recruit candidates to help counter the growing communist threat. Noriega was hand-picked by US intelligence agents, who were well aware of his dubious reputation. US agents trained him in intelligence gathering and guerilla warfare, and warned him on occasion of impending threats to Panama.

Reagan continued to support Noriega- despite receiving evidence that he rigged the 1984 elections, and was involved in illegal arms trading and drug trafficking. Noriega generously returned the favor: he assisted Reagan in his war against the Sandinista regime in Nicaragua, provided security for US bases, permitted military operations in Panama that exceeded the mandate of the original canal treaty, and ironically, supplied the US Drug Enforcement Agency (DEA) with information. Frederick Kempe emphasised that Noriega’s assistance to the DEA ‘had DEA agents working in Panama impeding the work of DEA’s Miami officials.’ Throughout this period, there was no substantial support for or interest in democratisation in Panama.”

Israel’s support of Hamas worked in similar ways. In 2019, Netanyahu reportedly said at a Likud Party meeting, “Anyone who wants to thwart the establishment of a Palestinian state has to support bolstering Hamas and transferring money to Hamas. This is part of our strategy — to isolate the Palestinians in Gaza from the Palestinians in the West Bank.” Retired religious affairs official Avner Cohen said in 2009, “Hamas, to my great regret, is Israel’s creation.” “The Israeli government gave me a budget and the military government gives to the mosques,” said Brigadier General Yitzhak Segev, as a means to destabilize any influence from any Communist factions and Fatah, a more secular party under the Palestine Liberation Organization (PLO).

There isn’t a true discussion about what Hamas’ role is in the resistance movement against Israel’s occupation- because ultimately, that is what it is. They are only a portion of the mass resistance. We could discuss their contradictions all day; but this tends to be the focus, as opposed to, again, their role in the resistance against occupation, thus again, totally omitting and dehumanizing the mass struggle of a people under occupation. That said, the IQB is the strongest armed force the people of Gaza have right now, and it has been interesting to see interviews with people who were captured and released. The primarily U.S. and U.K.-English-speaking sources were speaking consistently of torture and death, while all of the Israeli media i’ve seen portrays the resistance in a much more ‘humanistic’ light, to their consternation. There’s the story of the person who wanted a banana; Yocheved Lifshitz (another hostage who was released, along with Nurit Cooper), mentioned that she and the other hostages were treated well. “There are women who know what feminine hygiene means, they made sure we had everything, that the toilets were cleaned. They cleaned it, not us… They were very gracious, this must be said. They kept us clean, kept us fed.” When she was released, she shook the hand of a Hamas member and wished them peace. A long time peace activist (and member of Women Wage Peace (who also produced a message calling for a ceasefire)), she has been quite critical of the Israeli government and the IDF in interviews as well. To the point of U.S. media’s sensationalizing of events, here is a perfect example of how this is done, versus the matter-of-fact reporting of even Israeli media covering this story.

What is being focused on in western/imperialist media is her retelling (mostly through the translation of her daughter) of being beaten by sticks on the back of a motorcycle through plowed fields en route to Gaza (prior to meeting the people who ‘treated (her) well’), by what sounds from my ears to be interpreted as ‘Shabaab people.’ This is the part which confused me (and something i would need some more interpretation on), as Al-Shabaab exists in Somalia, and as far as i know has no involvement in Gaza. She also described how there were masses of people who were able to penetrate the expensive fences that were supposed to ‘protect the people’.

Ms. Lifshitz’s husband, Oded, who spent much of his life as a journalist and Palestinian rights activist (who did an expose on the forced expulsion of Bedouin people), was also a hostage, and was not let go at the same time as his wife. Another person, Yasmin Porat, while she called them “terrorists,” still maintained that she and the others who were held were treated “very humanely… no one behaved towards us violently.” She added that it was Israeli forces who actually shot hostages in the line of fire.

Yasmin Porat’s comment is interesting, in light of a Times Of Israel piece which highlights the response to Ms. Lifshitz’ interview, which is being looked at as a PR disaster that favors Hamas: “What a brave and enlightened woman, the kind we thought they no longer make in Israel, and what clumsy handling of the event.” The fact that there is more concern about image and PR than the safety of hostages is telling.

The reason i’ve been thinking about the response of the hostages though, is because it reminds me of numbers 3 and 11 of the Rules Of Discipline specifically, as expressed in the Handbook Of Revolutionary Warfare by Kwame Nkrumah: ‘Turn in anything captured’, and ‘Do not ill-treat captives’. This shouldn’t have to be reiterated; however, since this is a long piece, i will: While there are people who needlessly see Jewish people as a monolith and claim to hate them all; the primary objective of what is happening has nothing to do with ‘hating Jewish people,’ no matter how badly Netanyahu and other messianic Zionists want it to be.

“Our federal taxes contribute $3 billion yearly in military and economic aid to Israel. Over $200 million of that money is spent fighting the uprising of Palestinian people who are trying to end the military occupation of their homeland. Israeli solders fire tear gas canisters made in america into Palestinian homes and hospitals, killing babies, the sick, and the elderly…Encouraging your congresspeople to press for a peaceful solution in the Middle East, and for recognition of the rights of the Palestinian people, is not altruism, it is survival. ”

-Audre Lorde

“And equally, i think the people all around the Middle East, including in Jordan; we are just shocked and disappointed by the world’s reaction to this catastrophe that is unfolding. In the last couple of weeks we have seen a glaring double standard in the world. When October 7th happened, the world immediately and unequivocally stood by Israel and its right to defend itself, and condemned the attacks that happened. But what we’re seeing the last couple of weeks, we’re seeing silence in the world. Countries have stopped just expressing concern, or acknowledging the casualties; but always with a preface of declaration of support for Israel. Are we being told that it is wrong to kill a family, an entire family at gunpoint, but it’s okay to shell them to death? There is a glaring double standard here, and it’s just shocking to the Arab world. This is the first time in modern history that there is such human suffering and the world is not even calling for a ceasefire! So the silence is deafening, and to many in our region, it makes the western world complicit… through their support and through the cover that they give Israel and its right to defend itself; many in the Arab world are looking at the western world as not just tolerating this, but aiding and abetting it… Most networks are covering the story under the title of ‘Israel At War’. But for many Palestinians on the other side of the separation wall, on the other side of the barbed wire; war has never left. This is a 75-year old story. A story of overwhelming death and displacement to the Palestinian people. It is the story of an occupation, under an apartheid regime that occupies land, that demolishes houses, confiscates land. Military incursions. Night raids. The context of a nuclear armed regional superpower that occupies, oppresses, and commits daily documented crimes against Palestinians is missing from the narrative.”

-Rania Al Abdullah

With such an extensive focus on ‘Hamas’, not one person (outside of more revolutionary circles) has acknowledged that the Al-Aqsa Flood Battle was the work of an alliance of various resistance groups. Not many have made mention of (or has spoken with) the Union Of Palestinian Women’s Committees (UPWC), the Popular Front for the Liberation of Palestine (PFLP), or other formations and organizations led by the Palestinian masses. In a statement released by the PFLP on October 7, it read:

“Steadfast mountains from the ranks of the resistance have united in response to the call of Palestine, the call of Al-Quds and Al-Aqsa, during which the essence of the conflict is reclaimed and the honor of the Arab nation is restored. They are determined to achieve a strategic victory over this enemy in a battle that will open the door to return and redefine the history of Palestine and the region.”

While we struggle over ideas and have discussions in relation to what’s been happening (with the expectation that, of course, we resist using declarative statements and talking points with little knowledge of context); it is crucial to be aware of how language is utilized. There is indeed the not-so-veiled language of calling people ‘human animals’; but using the word ‘Hamas’ in and of itself is a dog whistle. The use of ‘killed’ vs. ‘dead’ is very similar to how ‘looting’ vs. ‘searching/finding’ had been used in 2005, during Hurricane Katrina. ‘Intervention’ vs. ‘Invasion’ also comes to mind.

While not exactly dog whistles in the traditional sense, fabrications have continued to be been weaponized, despite them being debunked. The most contentious example of a fabrication is the ’40 beheaded babies’ claim that has since been contested (due to there not being substantial evidence) and walked back. This claim is the ‘Nayirah testimony (aka ‘Incubator babies’ myth) of the day. That story was propped up by PR firm public relations firm Hill & Knowlton, who was representing Citizens for a Free Kuwait, in order to wage support for a U.S. invasion of Iraq. Nayirah was/is the daughter of Nasir al-Saud Al-Sabah, the Kuwaiti Ambassador to the U.S.

Another example of ‘atrocity propaganda’ is the IDF posting on social media that four armed ‘Hamas fighters’ had been caught and killed; however, Al Jazeera (and other keen eyes on social media) tracked certain “discrepancies and inconsistencies” which countered the IDF’s claim.

I have learned that a woman can be a fighter, a freedom fighter, a political activist, and that she can fall in love, and be loved, she can be married, have children, be a mother… Revolution must mean life also; every aspect of life.

-Leila Khaled

As we come to the conclusion of this post, i want to thank you for staying; i am aware and am empathetic to the fact that these times and the constantly developing information are difficult for many. This is one of the reasons i wanted to write- as an expression of my own feelings and frustration. However, even in these difficult times lies a glimmer of optimism for me; the masses of the world world are responding in a way that acknowledges the humanity of a people who have long been ignored, and continue to be occupied. This acknowledgement spans ethnicity, location, gender, orientation, ability or disability, and spiritual practice. As of this writing, i hope there were some questions answered for you, and definitely some questions asked. That said, i want to again address the notion of having an ‘apolitical’ or ‘centrist’ position (in general, but particularly on the issue spoken about in this piece).

Everything is political, as politics (in short) is defined as our relationship to power, whether individual or collective. If you have the ability to turn on a computerized device to read this post, there is a relationship to labor and land resources, and the contradictions that lie within that. If you did or did not watch a Netflix, Disney+, Apple, Warner Brothers, Paramount+ or Universal film or show during the SAG-AFTRA strikes, you have made a political decision regardless. People speak about the political themes within the Barbie and Oppenheimer films recently released (in the ways we are conditioned to address politics), but the paying to watch these two films which were funded by companies people were striking against is also a political decision. Whether or not you choose to ignore these things, it doesn’t alter its political relationship.

Whatever actions we take, it is taking a certain position.

Some of those political relationships are due to inevitable circumstances (such as, sharing communications about world events on a computer, or getting a job we may not necessarily align with). It should be obvious that what is being said here is not intended to demonize anyone who uses a laptop or has a Netflix account. We all have contradictions, based on the fact that we exist under capitalism. What we are intending to say is that it’s crucial we rethink our relationship to politics, because as the great Skunk Anansie song says, everything’s political. Politics is not simply about ‘voting’ or ‘when the government does stuff.’ It’s also about our response to, again, that relationship to power. In the book Politics For Social Workers Stephen Pimpare addresses the notion of an ‘apolitical’ position:

“In all kinds of contexts, people encourage us to keep politics out of things, as if politics exists in its own separate space and can be cordoned off, somehow making human relations easier to manage. But even when it is not an outright effort at shutting down dialogue and debate, this is a fool’s errand. Everything is political: politics is the way we make people aware of problems, introduce ideas into the public sphere, create frameworks for thinking about issues and their relative importance, structure debates about policy, frame defenses of justice and fairness and equity, and build consensus for change. Politics is how we improve the life of our clients, our families, our friends, and our communities; it is the “contest where some gain the authority to make decisions of fundamental significance for others.” Only if you don’t care who has that decision-making authority should you want to avoid politics.”

As we become more and more inundated with news both locally and internationally, it is crucial to remember that while some of us have the privilege to opt for ‘shutting everything off’, the rest of us cannot, as our mere existence is politicized, not by choice. The world does not stop, even if our worldview does.

If we say we stand for justice and peace, what do our actions entail? How many of us, as we take in the images and words of capitalist/western media, directly seek out the voices and perspectives of those who are marginalized, occupied and oppressed? How many of us do more in-depth research before we state a position? If we claim that education is a gateway to freedom (which honestly is a classist thing to say, let’s keep it real… but let’s still go with the question), how many of us are actually truly applying it? How many of us understand that taking no position on an issue is still taking a position?

If you are standing with ‘both sides’, that is, the occupier as well as the occupied; you have shown which side you actually stand on.

We will end with these words by the Palestinian Youth Movement: “Now and onwards, you must not allow your friends and comrades to turn their backs on the Palestinian liberation struggle. You must not allow them to falter in the face of the events of this week, or to devolve into insipid both-sideism or pragmatic armchair generalismo, or to publish cowardly denunciations that do nothing more than provide a left cover for an impending genocide on the people of Gaza. Most importantly, you must not allow them to lose sight of why the oppressed people resist; that it is not only understandable, not only an occupied people’s right, but also just and true.”

Think hard about which side you stand.

(For your consideration and further research, here is a resource list presented by the comrades at the Popular University Of The Palestinian Youth Movement (PYM): https://docs.google.com/document/d/1ol9GjNwTo99mPzXnRgL0ZLvs-fw0vc6MEPBJhuJHtbo/edit )

The Song That Saved My Life

(Note: This piece contains mentions of suicide and sexual assault)

“The role of the artist is exactly the same as the role of the lover. If I love you, I have to make you conscious of the things you don’t see.”

-James Baldwin

i think it was Jesse Michaels (of the band Operation Ivy) who said that “Music is an indirect force for change, because it provides an anchor against human tragedy.” i can never understand when someone creates or interprets music to be ‘simply for entertainment’, when music has always been a tool to communicate the will and desire of the masses. Music has also been a key of expression and connection for those who may otherwise struggle with their feelings. Music has been known to save lives.

At this time, it was a little song about a bullet that saved mine.

i have listened to ‘Just A Bullet Away’ by the band Metallica (a band i have written about plenty of times on other sites) on many an occasion with no problems. i actually have a tattoo inspired by the song. On this occasion though, i happened to listen to it at the moment intrusive thoughts were occurring. As it played i continually thought to myself, ‘if i had a gun right now, i would use it.’ i thought about what else i could use. i mean, there were a lot of things i have done and used in my life during previous attempts (which i will not name here). i didn’t even think to stop the song; in fact, i ended up additionally watching someone do a cover of it. In the middle of the video though, right before the song’s bridge flashed the number for the suicide prevention hotline. Despite me calling this number various times over the years; and despite these incessant thoughts, i didn’t even think to call.

All roads they lead to shame
All drowning in the blame

All hide beneath a skin
A hope so paper thin
I’m at the door again

Redemption purify
Will nothing satisfy
The scars just multiply

Eternal borderline
All the faces intertwine
Oh God… now I see mine
In the shine of the midnight revolver

Even the promise of danger has gone dull
Staring down the barrel of a .45

Do all reflections look the same
In the shine of the midnight revolver

Just a bullet away
Just a bullet away from leavin’ you
Just a bullet away
Stop the voices in my head

Whether metaphorical or literal, whether about struggling with addiction or actual incessant ideation; the song certainly reflected how i was feeling in the moment. i wanted the voices to cease.

Still, not thinking, i decided to also listen to another song, ‘Screaming Suicide’, and i began to cry deeply. About the song, James Hetfield (vocalist and rhythm guitarist) says, “The intention is to communicate about the darkness we feel inside. It’s ridiculous to think we should deny that we have these thoughts. At one point or another, I believe most people have thought about it. To face it is to speak the unspoken. If it’s a human experience, we should be able to talk about it. You are not alone.”

Then my voice appears
Teaching you of fears
Are you good enough?
You don’t recognize
Head is full of lies
You should just give up

Curse another day
Spirit locked away
Punish and deprive
Hate to be awake
Living a mistake
More dead than alive

i almost did give up.

Then a voice appears
Whisper in your ears
“You are good enough”
Throwing down a rope
A lifeline of hope
Never give you up

i have spoken its name many times. Still, i ask myself almost daily, ‘Am i really good enough?’ i have trouble believing i am. The first voice fights with the second voice constantly- and the first voice always seems to win.

i am taking a risk making a huge generalization here, but most people who experience ideation (whether minimally or incessantly) or opt to attempt and/or end their lives do not necessarily want to do it. It’s just that life has become so unbearable, and (i can only speak for myself here) for whatever reason there’s the constant thought that life would be better off without us.

But… as the song ended, and i sat there in tears, i made the decision at three am to phone the hotline.

Metallica (and by extension Alex Young) saved my life.

“…not many people have ever died of love. But multitudes have perished, and are perishing every hour…–for the lack of it.” 

-James Baldwin

What does Metallica (or ending one’s life) have to do with work or jobs?

Both my critical/analytical and creative brain are constantly going, which means that sometimes some of the most pronounced ideas or thoughts i have in terms of writing happen at the least opportune of times- on the toilet, in the shower or as i am trying to get to bed.  These thoughts also happen during the late nights and early mornings, while most are in bed. 

But again, what does any of this have to do with this blog? Because a brain that never stops and wants to create at seemingly inopportune hours isn’t beneficial for living under capitalism.  Because spending time on this earth sometimes feels like a job.  And it is tiring.

The work we do on ourselves is severely undervalued; the action to what is usually seen as ‘resolving’ depression is work, but acknowledging a struggle with depression or ideation (and acknowledging you need help) is work as well.

We are conditioned to observe this work as a hindrance to everyone else around us. People speak of suicide as ‘selfish’, because it’s assumed they did not think of the loved ones they left behind. It’s seen as a ‘permanent solution to a temporary problem.’

However, the jobs we do to keep afloat are rewarded when we appease the managers of society, who are being paid to do the bidding by their bosses- who profit off of the same constant struggles we are encouraged to sweep away. We are rewarded when we smile, and only smile.

Music can be used as a mirror to confront the ills of the status quo (as Michaels alluded to). It can also be that reward for the mirror we hold to ourselves. In many cases a response to someone’s trauma, sadness or depression is to immediately send a message to cheer them up. Many of us who receive these messages do not feel heard. The need to always avoid the subject and respond with extreme positivity can be invalidating. Even if that is not the intent, it feels as if our struggle is a burden to those we have confided in. i just told you i am experiencing self-doubt and depression, or was about to end my life, and the immediate response is to send a cat picture. Just a cat picture. Or a comedic sketch. Some people suggest happy music. And most people’s response (in my experience) is no response at all.

We want to know we are heard and feel supported. Sometimes, people listen to ‘sad’ music during these times, because the music says, ‘I see you, and I hear you.’

As a human species, community and connection are important. Therapists are also important and serve a purpose; but therapists exist in a lot of ways, because capitalism has ensured isolation. It has idealized depending on ‘the one’ to save you, whether that’s a therapist, a romantic partner, or a friend. It has romanticized nuclear family structures, as opposed to espousing the benefits of consensual non-traditional relationships and chosen families. Also, not everyone has the economic ability to obtain regular therapy. We go throughout our day, not necessarily recognizing that the person right next to us needs community, connection and comfort. People may reach out in a text, or through a phone call, but we have become so busy that we miss the text or forget to call back. Reaching out appears to be a daunting task; we don’t feel we have the capacity to ‘do enough’ for someone, even when all they may need is something as simple as a hello, or a hug. It’s similar to how organizing is viewed- it’s always seen as a larger than life task, when organizing involves everything from making and folding flyers, to childcare, to cooking to being in the streets. This fear leads us to stop communicating when someone is experiencing intense trauma, because under a capitalist society we have never learned how to deal with trauma in humanistic ways.

In the thrall of internalized shame, one is gripped by the compulsion to hide his face from the world. One’s own thoughts and feeling seem a foul pestilence from which to flee.

Cue: Existential dread. We are approaching the endgame of (global) capitalism; the system is headed straight to the landfill (its own creation) of history (that is, if global, late stage capitalism doesn’t bury the human species first by means of ecocide). Therefore, it is imperative, as we move towards the future, that we straddle the past as we become attuned to the lamentation of the ghosts of memory, personal and collective.

Deep emotional scars can warp libido; thus, in our age of corporate state hyper-authoritarianism, obsessive materialism, and neo-puritan pathology, all too many people have become terrified of their own passion–from sweat plangent lust to incandescent enthusiasm, right down to even accepting the shadows and perfumes borne of an inner life–and have withdrawn into forms of self-exile such as addiction, alienation, depression, compulsive materialism, and narcissistic striving.

-Phil Rockstroh

Back to ‘permanent solutions’ as mentioned earlier: capitalism and neoliberalism consistently are at times sold as temporary solutions to what end up being permanent problems for many- a market-based economy itself (this and this), high-interest loans through the IMF; the right-wing Heritage Foundation also critiques the role the IMF has played), austerity, sanctions and blockades.

In Mental Health Challenges Related to Neoliberal Capitalism in the United States, Anna Ziera’s report states, “Neoliberalism encourages individualism, which has decreased emphasis on the need for community and social connection for fulfillment. Since individualism is viewed as a desirable moral characteristic, asking for help, especially financially, is frowned upon. With complete faith in the free market to provide for all who wish to work, people who do not achieve financial success are blamed for their misfortunes increasing the stigma of poverty.”

In thinking about what (and how) i was going to write, i hearkened back to Karl Marx’ essay on suicide, based on economist Jacques Peuchet’s writings (Du suicide et de ses causes). Marx’ essay was written in 1846, two years prior to his (and Frederick Engels’) oft-quoted (and many times misinterpreted) Communist Manifesto. Marx’ essay was one i purchased as a teenager, simultaneously experiencing ideation as well as exploring where my political ideologies lie- a search i began from the age of 14. This copy of the book is one i still physically have.

Marx (whom two of his daughters also ended their lives) added his interpretation (which is in bold lettering) of Peuchet’s writing by saying, “All that has been said against suicide stems from the same circle of ideas.  One condemns suicide with foregone conclusions. But, the very existence of suicide is an open protest against these unsophisticated conclusions. They speak of our duty to this society, but not of our right to expect explanations and actions by our society.  They endlessly exalt, as the infinitely higher virtue, overcoming suffering, rather than giving in to it.  Such a virtue is every bit as sad as the perspective it opens up.  In brief, one has made suicide an act of cowardice, a crime against law, society, and honor.”

Also, “A dull bourgeois, who places his soul in his business and his God in commerce, can find all this to be very romantic and refute the pain that he cannot understand with derisive laughter.  We are not surprised by his derision. What else to expect from three-percenters, who have no inkling that daily, hourly, bit by bit, they kill themselves, their human nature.  But, what is one to say of those good people who play the devout, the educated, and still repeat this nastiness?”

An unjust, inhumane environment where labor is exploited, mental health struggles are reduced to an unspoken burden (or a series of slogans), and those on the margins of society are further marginalized is going to continually produce a population of people who are going to question the existence of life.

In the Zeira report, it states: “Attitudes toward people who receive government financial assistance can elicit feelings of shame from those who receive benefits.” There’s such an emphasis on ‘picking oneself up by the bootstraps’, the ‘self-made man’, and becoming ‘high value’; however, in a system that is dependent on economic disparities in order to thrive, the paths in which to achieve this ideal are unsustainable. Most people who hope to achieve some modicum of a CEO-style upper-level income do not aspire to exploit. The reality is though, this is what one must do if they’re going to maintain that level of wealth. If one has any level of empathy; if one’s value is based on building substantial relationships based on mutual respect and collaboration (as opposed to capitol acquisition and exploitation); if one has any level of respect for humanity, they are going to experience a dilemma.

Even after all this, even as i consistently rail against capitalism i acknowledge that i still fall subject to its pull.

All roads they lead to shame.

There’s also a shame associated with desirability. i want to address two types of desirability under capitalism here- one that is structural, and one that is personal. The social model of disability (which was coined by professor and activist Mike Oliver, but was adopted early on by the Union of the Physically Impaired Against Segregation (UPIAS)) examines the systemic or structural obstacles which prevent disabled people from participating to their fullest capacity. On music, i used to constantly wonder why it was i rarely saw people in wheelchairs at shows. As a person who, at this point in my life spends most of my time in a wheelchair, venues do not make it easy to navigate. The house i live in, i have had to adapt; but it’s not ideally accessible. It costs money to make it so.

Under capitalism, the role is to ensure you’ve got as many bodies as possible to exploit. If a society is going to at least present the illusion that some humanity exists, you will have funds allocated to assist folks who are disabled. However, the caveat is the hour upon hour of dealing with paperwork, phone calls with people who just see you as a number, and the ‘promise’ that you will not earn over a certain amount if you are going to continue receiving disability, even if that amount is not enough to cover rent/mortgage, bills and food combined.

In How Capitalism Contributes to Ableism, Chris Costello (who has cerebral palsy) writes, “Not only does capitalism give rise to disability oppression, I believe it also perpetuates it. The capitalists have both an economic and ideological interest to exclude workers based on perceived disability… The capitalist needs the average worker to produce commodities — that is, goods and services to be sold on a market. The capitalist also needs the worker to produce these commodities to be produced in the average amount of socially-necessary labor time. If a worker is too slow and cannot meet these requirements, the capitalist loses time that could be adding more value for himself. If a worker is too slow, they earn less profits for the given capitalist. Thus, there are purely economic reasons for a capitalist system to reject disabled people as workers. These workers cost more and cut into profit.”

Also: “The oppression of the disabled does not depend on the individual will, good or bad, of any particular capitalists. The objective, systemic laws of capitalist production confront the capitalists as a coercive force external to them. Even the bosses are not in full control of the system: market forces are. It is not about a capitalist being good or bad, it is about the logic of the system.”

In How Capitalism Contributed to Modern Conceptions of Disability, Costello opts towards a solution. “I believe disability oppression will cease to exist when we can overcome production for the sake of profit. We currently exist in a society that values human beings in proportion to their capacity to contribute to the production of surplus value. But that is not the only way to produce things. We could just as easily organize the economy around meeting human needs, rather than profit. We would be able to slow down production so impaired people could keep up and contribute to society fully. Organizing production in an anti-capitalist/socialist direction would combat disability oppression.”

i now want to address the personal ways in which capitalism shapes desirability. Costello addresses further in the Ableism piece, the steps sometimes taken to ‘fix’ folks on the disability spectrum, similar to how well-meaning (and not-so well meaning) people singularly suggest or utilize positive thought to fix’ or ‘cure’ depression. “Parents are generally advised to take measures, whether medical or therapeutic, to make their child as “normal” as possible. They face tremendous pressure to pathologize their children instead of working to make their lives as meaningful as possible.”

Also: “Ableism in the United States promotes the idea that disability is a personal tragedy. As we have seen, nothing could be further from the truth. The personal tragedy narrative is about the idea of “overcoming” disability through rehab or surgery, or else acknowledging their impairment and bravely going on in spite of it. In both cases, we are encouraged to look at disability as simply a set of obstacles that inexplicably arise to thwart us, rather than examining the barriers capitalist society puts in front of us.”

Sounds patronizing, doesn’t it?

“(C)consider(ing) the economic and societal factors that promote ableism and oppression” are of utmost importance, if we as a people are genuine about solutions. If a child ‘lashes out’, there most likely is an underlying reason they are doing so. People lament the existence of crime without addressing class and social inequities, as well as the question of who is determining what crime is what. The factors that drive ableism are the same factors that drive the stigmas toward people experiencing and living with depression and/or ideation.

‘Cause you lied

Subconsciously, i still believe these lies, and project them onto myself.

i am a person with a disability- a very apparent one. i have no problem saying that, as it is a reality. While there are days i do struggle (basic things like chores and getting the mail are not necessarily the easiest), while leaving and returning to the house is a whole event, and while i have to physically adapt to every single thing in my life now; i am very grateful to be alive (despite the ideation and depression). Being an amputee has been an incredibly humbling experience.

That said, whatever anxieties i have had about my body have now been heightened. Prior to being an amputee there were particular parts of my body i was fixated on, to the point of dysmorphia. i don’t talk about it much at all. There are times- pretty much daily- that i feel relief in being an amputee in that it’s a little more of a struggle for me to get out of the house. If i don’t go out, the world doesn’t have to see me. Simultaneously i do want to leave the house, so i can just be outside… but i fear people looking at me.

Photos by Harry Langdon

For all reflections look the same
In the shine of the midnight revolver

It took me 38 years before i could even be okay with looking at my reflection in the mirror.

For years (since i was a teenager) i wanted to look like the front cover of Diana Ross’ first solo album in 1970: tiny, flat chested… She looked like a tiny child, despite having a whole adult romantic relationship with Motown CEO Berry Gordy, and giving birth to a child they both produced, in 1971. We could have debates all day about the moral or ethical nature of that relationship (due to the power imbalance), but i will save that for another time. One thing i do know is when i first saw that cover it encapsulated everything i wanted to be.

Invisible.

Despite the photo on the back of the album of the same person who was on the front; while i thought she was beautiful, that woman was not something i aspired to. She was womanly. She was going to be seen. And sexualized in some capacity.

i remember being 10 years old and going on a strictly tuna fish diet for a week. That was the beginning of a relationship with food, based on control. i aimed to do it not simply because i wanted to lose weight, but because that weight loss was tied to not being looked at. i always wanted to be as straight and slim as a board, so i wouldn’t be adultified or ogled by catcallers walking down the street. It is disgusting that i would even have to worry about that kind of thing as a child.

i never told anyone at this point that i was sexually assaulted on the back of a school bus at the age of 8, with onlookers laughing at me. i do not know if that moment triggered the relationship i developed with my body. i really cannot say. i briefly mentioned it in a poem i wrote when i was 15, but i finally told my story in my early 30s.

My fears about ‘growing in certain places’ got more pronounced as i hit puberty, and i saw my sister growing, and getting comments. She also liked boys though, and i did not desire that attention. i never developed anorexia or bulimia, but i became a vegetarian at 14 (and a vegan three years later- which i still am), and i was very active, so i stayed small enough. i was also a punk kid, so people thought i was weird enough to stay away from in that way- another reason why punk is a blessing.

As a teenager i started to develop feelings for a few people i considered friends; however, the feeling was never mutual. This was a pattern that repeated itself over the years, well into adulthood. The feelings were romantic, but a lot deeper than a focus on the physical. However, because i was raised in a society that equates/conflates romance with sex, even though i couldn’t see it i assumed my feelings or attractions were also physical or sexual, as opposed to simply aesthetic or emotional.

There have been times where i did binge eat as a means of control and hiding as well. If i hid behind food, then no one would pay attention to me.

It got to the point where there were a few people who were interested in me primarily in a physical way, and that scared me. i had moments where i was physical with others, but the first time i had what people usually define as ‘sex’ was at the age of 21. It was not exactly consensual as i did not say yes, nor did i say no. i was like a deer caught in headlights as it was happening. i didn’t have anyone to talk to when this happened to me, as this conversation wasn’t even in the public lexicon in the 1990s.

The sexual experiences i have had over the years have been with cis-hetero men who have been abusive (and coerced me into not using protection), or primarily wanted something physical, but not much beyond that. (Women and trans, asexual, pan or nonbinary folks don’t really approach me or show interest like that; i don’t know why.) There was something these men wanted from me (besides the sex)- either to exploit any low self esteem i may have had, or to (in retrospect) use me as a muse to access a connection to their own ‘Blackness’.

One of these men (who told me when i was laying there in the hospital that i was one of the bravest and most important people to him, but also eventually texted that he could no longer talk to me) asked me (again, as i was in pain in a hospital bed) if now being an amputee was going to make me fat.

While i could sit here all day and write a dissertation on how ableist and vain that question is- That is not a question i would ask someone who almost died but eventually survived being hit by a truck, and lost a leg- the one thing i was aware of was how fast any dysmorphia i had returned. As i lay there naked and completely vulnerable as nurses and techs cleaned and wiped me every single day; as i lost 20 pounds as my body worked on healing itself, and as i gained the weight back after i did heal… i maintained a fixation on wanting to still be invisible.

i worked really hard over the years to accept and love myself, and my body. It finally happened at the age of 42. i did jiu jitsu and striking/kickboxing. i was getting better at pullups. i loved riding my bicycle everywhere. Now i have to start over again; when i go outside everyone will see me with just one massively swollen foot and a skin grafted leg.

When i go out people are generally nice to me, but i don’t necessarily feel desired.

i feel like a giant blob with one leg. i dread the summer months, because i cannot be comforted with a sweater or hoodie, concealing my body.

Here is where my contradictions lie. i don’t necessarily feel infantilized when people see me, but at times i do feel patronized, when people tell me i’m brave, or that they wouldn’t know what to do if they became an amputee. Or when people stare at me as if i’m helpless. It is dehumanizing. i question if i was used/dehumanized in some capacity in my sexual experiences (pre-amputation) as well, because i ultimately was a means to a particular end- i’ve begun to question if any non-physical interaction was a calculated way to achieve whatever ends they had in mind. i honestly don’t know.

It comes around, back to desirability. Even as i talk about desire and being desired, i write about it with the understanding that it’s going to be interpreted in a particular way by people who view it with that particular lens. Desire tends to be observed in a specific way, with regards to physical/sexual attraction. If attraction is a reflection of the world around us, then systemically it would make sense why i have never been seen as desirable, in terms of a romantic relationship.

In the Book Sexed Up, Julia Serano discusses sexualization “as a more general tactic to delegitimize and dehumanize people.” If we fall outside of the socially accepted desired norms, people who have been marginalized by the expectations of the norms (whether it’s orientation, gender, ethnicity or disability, etc.) will be seen as “sexually deviant, or predatory, or hypersexual, or desperate, or undesirable, or exotic, or… a ‘fetish object.'”

i have never truly been desired in ways where i am seen as a full human. i recall being told more than a few times over the years that i’d be “a good wife and mother.” i’ve always been told that i’m a ‘nice person.’ i was never sure what any of that meant ultimately, especially as the people who tended to tell me that were married (sometimes with kids themselves), and they had no real interest in me romantically (fortunately).

On the surface, being told you’d make a good wife and/or mother may sound like a compliment; however, like a lot of things i’ve mentioned here it can also be pretty patronizing. Being a wife and/or mother is viewed as virtuous (as opposed to someone who makes the conscious decision to not be those things); it is something that is valued in a heteronormative/heterosexist society and yet mothers are devalued, because it is ‘unpaid work.’ You have to wonder if it’s assumed i’d be a ‘good wife and mother’ because women who are caretakers (or assumed to be so) are not seen as ‘desirable’. Was i often seen as being viewed as a potential ‘good wife/mother’, because it would be expected of me to produce constantly free emotional labor, in addition to a nurturing side that women are expected/assumed to have?

Who is going to care for me?

Anyone i had a real interest in did not reciprocate those feelings; so with what very well may be considered to be an aspect of compulsory sexuality, as mentioned, in order to know what it felt like to be with someone i did get with abusers, or those who had no interest in forming a substantial relationship with me. Had i not done those things, my guess is that at my current age (which is almost 50) i still may not have known what it was like to be with anyone.

i am not writing this for anyone to feel sorrow or pity for me. i learned a lot about myself in these experiences; and like everything else in life, i see these experiences as dialectical.

But we are still here, at the question of desirability. And capitalism.

There has been such a focus on ‘the loneliness of men’, or ‘How masculinity has failed’ as of late. Queries such as these (and there are many) are consistently (and at times, singularly) tied to the brokenness of men. Even if it’s being touted as a it’s a biting critique of ‘toxic masculinity and the manosphere’, there’s still an underlying heteronormativity in the critiques. And a overwhelming emphasis that it’s primarily men who are affected by feelings of rejection and loneliness. Some, but not all pieces on this touch on capitalist frameworks of masculinity being the primary contributor to this ‘epidemic’. Boys and men are being asked to perform tasks that are impossible to fulfill. Their desire to belong and be heard is not fulfilled, and they find someone (usually on the internet) who speaks to them.

Based on my experience of being rejected and being seen as ‘just a friend’ more times to the point where i’ve stopped counting, i could have just as easily fallen into one of these alternate universes. It may not make sense to some, but recognizing the importance of political education in identifying the ways in which we are systemically conditioned to view various types of relationships helps me to make sense of my own misery, which in turn prevents me from acting said misery out on others.

As a darker skinned, very openly anticapitalist, not traditionally feminine woman with a lot of tattoos (who has at some points semi-regularly been called ‘mister’ or ‘sir’ by adult strangers and asked if i was a boy or a girl by children), i’ve certainly over the years been (unfortunately) catcalled; but most (if not all) men who catcall are not looking for a meaningful companionship with you. Objectification more or less warrants a type of control, as opposed to a type of desire i am speaking of.

i live with the understanding that i may never have that experience of being desired, or be in a healthy (romantic) companionship. As i was not deemed desirable enough (beyond the physical) to have a healthy/non-toxic companionship with someone prior to being an amputee; as a woman who now has an apparent disability (in addition to all the other things) i have another set of anxieties, as i wonder if i am going to be fetishized by those who claim interest.

i have never been online to seek out a companion (nor do i ever intend to), but i do think of my own experiences offline, and the experiences of people who tend to not be seen, because the online world (just like music communities in general) is a reflection of what goes on in the ‘real world’.

Because of course, there’s also Satoshi Kanazawa. Remember him? Fortunately, this piece was heavily debunked and critiqued.

What happens to all the broken people in the end? They get thrown away, because they cannot function in a way capitalism needs them. So exploiters of a different kind become the new heroes.

See what i mean by all of this feeling like a job?

‘Cause you lied
Yes you lied

All the shame i feel about my body is a lie. Because someone created the lie.

i know this, and yet still…

i cannot stop the voices in my head.

i want to be desired, but not objectified. i want to be desired, but because i am not desired i want to disappear. i want to disappear because i don’t want to be looked at. i don’t want to be looked at because i have returned to hating my body. i am not even talking about my body being desired sexually. i just hate my body right now. i hate admitting that. And if i hate patriarchal notions and conditioning of how we view the body, why do i hate mine?

i hate that i have this contradiction. i hate it because the body i have now, it’s more likely to be objectified. It’s more likely to be attacked.

i want to be Diana Ross in 1970 (without the fame) so bad. i want to be invisible.

But i also want to be desired. And loved. i want to be held. i want intimacy.

i want to be and feel heard, and seen beyond my body.

When i go out into the world, that is the first thing you see.

All any of us want is to be and feel heard. It is, again, one of the reasons people look for connection wherever they can find it, whether that’s in a community, a writing or a song.

What i have written here hasn’t even scratched the surface of what is happening in my brain. i honestly don’t know where i fit in, when it comes to my life right now. i don’t know where i fit in with my body. i don’t know where i fit in with the people in my life. i feel out of place with everything, and overwhelmed.

Life feels like a job. But through it all, it was a song that saved my life.